As a licensed mental health counselor, I have observed that many couples hold suspicions about each other. Some of them are benign and even helpful such as, "I suspect that my husband will get me a gift for Christmas." As a result of this positive suspicion, a wife may have positive feelings and behaviors towards her spouse.
But other suspicions can be very negative and involve things such as," I suspect my partner doesn't really love me," or "I think he/she just gave me that gift to check off a box and look good to others." These negative suspicions, these type of hunches, about the other person's motivations and character can be rooted in past experience, and some of that experience may have been with the Suspect. These negative theories that border on beliefs must be addressed or else the relationship will not be healthy.
For example, when one suspects that underneath it all their partner doesn't want to be in a relationship based on equality, they begin to see everything their partner does or does don't do through that lens. A dish left in the sink becomes proof that you think I am your slave. The fun item just purchased is evidence that you think you are entitled to more of the money than I am. An orgasm reached first gets interpreted as you not being patient enough to wait for me because you only think of yourself. Soon, even the good times are bad.
If not brought to the light for examination, I find couples testing each other in ways to prove their belief, and since no one likes to be wrong, the results of these tests often seems to confirm their negative suspicions. Although to be fair, sometimes the negative suspicion exists because it is accurate.....
You may wonder whether or not you should directly address the suspicion by bringing it to your partner's attention. If you do decided to address it, you may wonder how to do that without creating even more negative experiences, such as a fight with no problem solving.
If you are going to bring up your negative theories, let it be for the purpose of resolving it. If you are already convinced of your belief and are not open to information that will challenge your perceptions, then there is no point in discussing the matter. I guess you will remain unhappy. You can also end the relationship and it would be best to do that in many cases in my professional experience.
But for those of you only partially convinced of your partner's negative motivations, you may want to check your work. There may have been past negative events that helped form your suspicions today, but you may wonder if your partner really still feels that way, believes that, would do that again...? You may wonder if any growth has occurred. Hopefully, it has in you both.
For a guide on how to talk to and resolve the wall between you built by unresolved negative suspicions, go to: https://lastinglove.us/products/resolving-suspicions-with-your-partner